Only on Vashon- the weekly rundown 4/23/21

The detour is getting a little old. At first we liked the change of scenery, but now we’re sick of it. There was a proposal to get around the detour by zip lining over the bridge. You’d have a hard  landing in my yard, but my 5-year-old says we can solve that by getting a trampoline.

We’re concerned about other people’s driving. Someone even wrote and illustrated a poem showing us how to drive. It involved a big X over a stick figure jaywalking. I propose that if people can get tickets for driving too fast, then I should get credits for driving too slow. 

We’ve been advised not to wave people through the 4-way when it’s not their turn. This thread led to conversations about how to communicate with other drivers while in the car.  We need car horns that, rather than honking, play messages like ‘Running late for ferry’ and ‘You’re a jerk! Learn to drive.’ A group member said we need those sorts of signs for our bodies as well, and someone responded with, “like arms?” That made my day. 

The Vashon Heritage Museum has a picture from 50+ years ago when there was a traffic light at the 4-way. This must means that complaining about the intersection is part of our heritage. 

A car alarm was going off on the ferry.  It wasn’t mine, thankfully. I’m always afraid I’ll be that guy. Luckily, my car alarm only goes off when I unlock the car with my key. Everyone in the Thriftway parking lot loves me when that happens, especially the worker who had the good fortune of bringing my groceries to my car. 

Someone removed the VAC sign from private property. Maybe they thought it was an eyesore, but you can’t remove eyesores from other people’s property. Thank god, or everything I own would be whisked away. They’ve called themself the Island Ad Blocker. I wonder what kind of cool superhero-mobile they drive. Probably a Subaru. 

*some restrictions apply

I’m tempted to put an ad for this blog at the corner of 204th. It’d fit right in with the ads for cider and fireworks, and the various RVs for sale in the Sound Foods parking lot.  And then if the Ad Blocker brings it to me, it’ll be like having a pen pal.

There are loads of free plants on offer as people clear out their gardens. I could take some and replant them, or just give them directly to my chickens to eat. So far today they’ve taken out a lavender plant and my grass seedlings, and that’s on top of two half-eaten bananas and a bowl of soggy cereal. I can’t be mad at them, though. Especially my beloved rooster Hawky, who looks just like Abraham Lincoln. 

All he needs is a top hat.

We’re wondering if you can recycle bottle caps, and if so, do you leave them on the bottle or separate them? To the best of my understanding, you save up all bottle caps until your kid’s class does a mosaic project, and then you send your kid to school with a bag full of them. 

Finally, someone shared a meme of what happens when 4/20 falls on a Tuesday. It involved a taco. Were you aware that some people don’t know that Tuesday, the holy day named after the Norse god of war Tyr, is canonically known as Taco Tuesday? Though why people are stuffing a taco full of oregano buds is beyond me. 

Anna Shomsky
Author: Anna Shomsky

I'm a former teacher and a data engineer living on Vashon Island. My writing has appeared in Five on the Fifth, Women on Writing and on the Post-Culture Podcast. I wrote and produced the radio show Whispers of Vashon for 101.9 KVSH. I’ve had short stories published in the anthologies Island Stories and Chicken Scratchings, as well as through the Open Space Literary Project.

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